The Hannah Family

Katie has her very own apartment

I’m sad

Now Mark’s dad is in the hospital. He has a number of health issues, all exacerbated by continued smoking. Hopefully he will respond to the breathing treatments and get discharged soon. 

This dog

We went to the dog park, but had to leave immediately because Chloe was acting nuts trying to dominate the nice pups. It’s a good thing she’s cute. Geez! 

Latest re: Pat

Visited again today and it turns out the discharge from hospice is fake news due to her continued weight loss. She'd lost 10 pounds in the spring and lost another 4 pounds in the past 6 weeks -- despite eating well all year (body is no longer absorbing nutrients properly due to the profound dementia). She now weighs 109 pounds, and measures under 5'2 due to osteoporosis. The dietitian is on her case and seemed pleased to know that was Mom's profession as well. They are all focused on comfort care, skin care to avoid pressure ulcers, and encouraging her to eat. They will not force her get a feeding tube because of her advance directives and poor prognosis.

Her delusions and hallucinations were diminished this past year, but today she kept reaching out in front of her wheelchair for something only she could see. Unlike before, she didn't display agitation so that was good. 

She smiled when I straightened her pillows

Alert and absent at the same time

In keeping with the year everything broke

My new carbon monoxide detector was showing 40 (doesn’t go off until 70). It should be zero so I drove over to our new fire station to ask their advice. He said he wanted to check with his specially calibrated detector and confirmed the presence of CO. Next he called the gas company to find the leak. Their representative figured out the carbon monoxide was leaking from our oven the whole time Thanksgiving dinner was cooking. Guess I’m getting a new gas stove for Christmas and hopefully a lot less excitement.

What are you grateful for?

My family, four children and five pets.💕

I’m so pleased

They said if she continues to eat 100% of what they feed her (by hand, mind you so it’s an undertaking), they will discharge Pat from hospice as she’s stable. [I love the way their orientation poster lets you know it took me five days to get this posted with everything that’s going on!]

We’re home

The weather was (finally) sunny for Jane’s funeral. She was laid to rest in the mountains with an impressive view.

Something compelled me to speak at the service and I’m relieved that it worked out. Attaching a copy to the obituary.

We will spend Christmas in the mountains this year with PaPa so he has company. 

**Actually I can't post the whole thing (it's probably 400 words-ish) on the funeral home site so let's see if it'll fit here:

 

 

Thank you Verlen for the opportunity to speak today; it means a lot. Jane is my mom-in-law. I’m Margaret, better known as Chelle. I’m married to Mark. He and I are blessed with four beautiful children, two boys and two girls.

 

I met Jane just over 30 years ago when I began dating my husband. She welcomed me immediately to her table and then into her family. Good thing because no way was I walking away from her amazing cooking. And that was before I’d tasted her biscuits! 

 

The first Christmas I spent with her family was the first Christmas without their son Scott. It was an emotional time. Jane cried and laughed as she shared a story of how Scott used to open the new bag of chips as soon as she returned from the commissary. He would eat the whole potato chips and clip the bag for the rest of the family. They were too slow and got the mostly broken chips. Scott’s absence and their remembrances reinforced for me that we shouldn’t take people for granted. None of us knows how long we will have together. 

 

Granny laughed a lot, but rarely as hard as when we played that card game 'Old Maid' with the kids. She’d sit very still, trying not to give away the fact she had the only queen but everyone knew based on the wild look in her eyes. Eventually someone would pull the dreaded card out of her hand, and Jane would howl, laughing until she was in tears, making all of us laugh just as hard.

 

She and I talked about her passing once in a while, as a vague “it happens to all of us” kind of thing. It struck me that she voiced the same wish each time. Jane told me all she wanted was for her grandchildren to remember her in a positive light, to think well of her. That’s it, just to be loved and for them to feel the same. I told her not to worry, that she had it in the bag.

 

 

They say you can’t pick your family and it’s true, but we get to choose our spouses. When I picked Mark, I got the best in-laws in the world. I love you, Dad. And I love you, Mom. I trust you and Scott are together laughing and eating perfect potato chips. I’m going to miss you!