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3 entries from July 2021

Mom’s Celebration of Life was perfect

It was a beautiful day in a beautiful cemetery. We met four of the Keepnews for breakfast: My Uncle Bob and our cousins Terry, Patty and Sue. It was wonderful to have that time. Claire and Dave already love them too which makes me happy.

Then the 24 of us gathered around for a service by Deacon Tony. I could feel my legs shaking from thinking about leaving Mom there and so much emotion, but I was good. Several of us spoke about Mom and that was incredibly special. Peter and I stayed with her, and said our goodbyes again. (Claire and Dave were very strong. This is their third and final funeral for their beloved grandparents in the past couple years. They’ve lost a lot very quickly.)

We then went to the Celebration of Life hosted by my dad’s best friend, Jerry. He has a huge house with a magical backyard - gorgeous lawn, so many flowers, trees, and a big fish pond. We shared photos of Mom and stories. We ate lunch, had drinks, and enjoyed being together.

As evening approached, we moved the party to Kristen’s house (Pinky and Jerry’s daughter). We ate a delicious dinner and the kids jumped on the trampoline. We took turns going around the table and telling our favorite Pat stories. Long day, but I completed my mission and we honored Mom. Mom, I love you!

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That was probably the biggest pause

since I started the blog! I didn’t even realize. During a conversation today with sweet Joanne (friends and dietitians rule!), she mentioned following my posts and I abruptly realized I haven’t made any lately. I’m pretty sure Dianne (school friends and GodMom’s rule!) said the same thing.

The loss of our mother continues to break against me like waves in the ocean or a shore. We’re all fine; we saw the storm coming and knew its precise path. So much advance notice. So much time to prepare. The loss still hurts. I’m grateful Mom expressed the desire to be cremated so I could take a “pause” emotionally and finish out my first school year of primary teaching.

Okay, let’s do a “me” and switch to the good stuff. Revamping the blog is still on my list - way overdue. I’m adding a tab of the photos of Pat we’re bringing to her Celebration of Life Saturday morning. She will be laid to rest in my dad’s plot, as per her wishes. I know I am sad, emotional, unwilling to let go, yada yada, but it’s time. Mom was an amazing caregiver for G. Dot and grandma’s sis, A. Ruth when they were diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease. Pat’s example provided a road map for me and then Mom was cared for superbly for YEARS (just like Dot and Ruth). I am relieved about that. I still miss my mom.